March 14, 1945
My dearest Phil,
Today was one of those rare spring days when the weather is just "too too" and you get too much spring fever to really accomplish. Regardless, I got off a good day's work, but that doesn't stop this continual desire to want you, to see you and to be with you - actually.
I was so tired last night I couldn't wait till I got to bed. Adele woke once during the night, but for the most part I caught a fair night of rest. Adele and I went walking at about 9 A.M. I let her push her doll carriage along the sidewalk and we walked back and forth for about 20 minutes. I got to work early and had a busy day. I've informed her of Betty Jane, the doll that supposed to come and play with her, from daddy. I even showed Adele which side of the bed you'll sleep on and when she lays in bed with me, she says, "Mommy will sleep here and daddy will sleep here" (pointing to the places).
The girl who came into clean finished working today. The place looks swell, but she couldn't do either my room or Mom's. Mom told her to come next Thursday and she says it will only cost $4 and carfare. It seems that the difference the girl made has to be paid to the agency. $6 a day is certainly a good salary for her.
Today I heard Harry say to Goldie, "What do you do around here all day long?" It struck me funny that even he should ask her such a question. Goldie thinks she's the busiest girl in creation. In fact I've never seen any one be so busy with nothing. Remember, I, too raised a baby and still am, besides holding down an almost full-time job and a house. Phil, I don't mind having a girl come into the house, since we're all chipping in, but every little bit cuts very deep into savings and savings mean more to me at this time then anything else. I've given up everything, being wife, mother, housekeeper and everything I hold dear and so something has to compensate for it meantime and it's savings. I fully intend to give up 4906, as we discussed, but I am not going to say anything till after Passover, at which time I am definitely going to make a move. I've thought and thought and thought about it, sweet, and you can rest assured I'll do nothing to cause hard feelings. I'm sure each one will understand when I explain. Please do not write to Mom or anyone concerning this until I've told you in detail what happened, and how they reacted. Please do not feel badly about anything I may say, for it is for all our respective good if I do it. We're going to buy our own place after the war and fix it up right - by ourselves. In fact, we'll almost have to get married again, if’n you know what I mean and I'm sure you know what I mean. I'm in a "thinking" mood - or hadn't you noticed? In case you haven't received any mail for the past few days it's because I wrote air-mail two days in a row. I thought I'd try v-mail this evening to keep the mail steady. I think my typed v-mails would make a good sized airmail letter, don’t you? Good night, dearest Phil, I love you and want you constantly and I'll never cease being unhappy until you return to
14 March 1945
Am writing this just after work (another very full day), and before getting cleaned up and dressed to go to the dance at the Aero Club. It has been a long time since I’ve been to one of the weekly shindigs at the Club, and because I’ve seen the picture at the theater (Hairy Ape), and feeling the need for a bit of divertissement, I decided I’d go down to look on at Klein—his dancing and generally atrocious yet amusing antics. The sun continued to shine today, but there is still a chill in the ever-present breeze.
Today’s mail call brought me three very nice, fairly recent V-mails (6, 7, 8 March), which is better service than I’ve enjoyed in many months. I’ll answer as much as I have time and space for tonight, Sweet, and continue tomorrow.
No, Chippie, I guess you know by now that I didn’t feel exactly as you did on 6 March. Does the thought that I’m 30 depress you so, that you get the blues contemplating it? At least that’s what I gathered from the beginning of your letter: “Happy Birthday! I wonder if you felt as I did all day long? I had an awful case of the blues, and still have it.”!!??
The few paragraphs about Adele’s latest batch of “bright sayings” made mighty gratifying and amusing reading. She must be smart as a whip! What do you do, Ev, when she gives out with something real fresh like “I smarter than you are, Mommy”? Do you kiss her, spank her, or just stand shocked and stupefied at her precociousness? My curiosity is very much piqued on this point, and I’d really like to know.
Thanks for the 31 kisses, my darlings. (I hope the extra one is meant for good luck??) I love you both so very much—I pray to be with you before my next birthday. Good bless you both. Love to all from